🤗Absolutely, we used to change the way we felt. Our problem centers in our mind. For me, it is all or nothing. No, mind altering chemicals if you are an alcoholic/addict. No marijuana maintenance.
We feel our feelings today, and learn to grow up. We outgrow our sensitivity to hurts and learn to grow up through working the twelve steps. Just not drinking or using is not the answer. We must have a spiritual experience and find God. Nothing is impossible with God. My sponsor told me that we either find God or not.
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous has the solution to every problem, that I could ever have. In the back of the book, one of my favorite stories was the “Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict”. The newer versions of our book do not use that title, but I think it is important for addicts to read. It has helped me so much to live my life with serenity and peace.
I have to accept things that I cannot change, but I do not have to put up with abuse and do not have to keep living with it. Acceptance does not mean that we have to accept whatever crap that someone else does to us. It means we have a choice and we can decide how we want to act or react to others. I steer clear of those living in the “problem”, and I choose to live in the “solution”.
“And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation–some fact of my life–unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly as it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy.
I need to concentrate on not so much on what needs to be changed in the world, as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.” Big Book, 3rd. Edition, 1976, pp. 449