Consider The Source

The thought crossed my mind today that I needed to “Consider the Source”. I learned it from my program. I have accepted the fact that not everyone is going to love you or like you, so you must consider the source. Some others may try to hurt you, use or abuse you, but you have to be strong and learn to say “No” to their evil ways.

If the evil ones don’t like me that is alright, because their opinion of me does not matter. It only matters what God thinks of me, and I am not on this earth to please the ungodly. My God wants me to speak the TRUTH, whether anyone else wants to hear it or not. Stand my ground, and Speak up against evil. I have always been a writer so I write about the things that are important to me. My God loves me unconditionally and He does not expect me to be perfect. I only have to do the best that I can with what He has given me. 

In Life You Will Realize That There Is A Purpose For Everyone You Meet.

In life there is a purpose for everyone

In Life You Will Realize That There Is A Purpose For Everyone You Meet.

Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.

But most important are the ones who bring out the best in you, respect you and accept you for who you are. Those are the ones worth keeping around.  

God has put people into my life that have shown me what I do not want to be like, and He has also put the people into my life that have shown me what I do want to become like.  

Choose wisely. And…hopefully you will get to the point to where you are tired of paying the consequences for your bad decisions, and so you will learn to make better decisions. God will keep putting you in those situations until you learn your lesson and then you can stop repeating your self defeating actions, that are not in your best interests.

 

We Are Not Responsible for the Actions of Others!!

Today, Sally, we believe God wants you to know that greatness is your birthright.

Who are You to shine brighter than others? Who are You to take a step forward when others are shrinking back? Who are You to make others feel insecure with your greatness? You are a child of God. Take a step forward, shine bright, – inspire others with your light to their own greatness.

Do NOT allow others to make you feel guilty for taking care of yourself and your family first. The Bible tells us to do just that! Take care of Americans FIRST! Do NOT allow others to manipulate you with fear or guilt. No one chooses to be used or abused. Change you, the only one that you can change. Get the hell away from those that want to use and abuse you and blame you for their unhappiness. 

Abusers control, manipulate and make you feel like your are the one with the problem. Stand up, Speak out and take back your life. You are NOT to blame!

Never lost a thing

abbie in wondrland

Most every time I’m with a group of sober people, someone talks about the things they lost because of their addiction. “I lost my kids, my spouse, job, my truck, my self-respect, etc., etc., etc. to my drug of choice.”
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Really?

I gotta say that I agree with what an oldtimer used to say about that. He said “I never lost anything because of my drinking. I traded it all. Nothing was more important to me than that next drink, so when the disease demanded that I give away my family and my job, I agreed.”

“Give it away, give it away, give it away, now”

He said “I didn’t lose my wife, I knew right where she was- at my neighbors house! She left me because I wouldn’t stop drinking or acting a fool. I can’t blame her! I didn’t lose my house. It’s right where it’s always been…

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Abuse is NOT your fault. Yes, really.

Abuse is NOT your fault. Yes, really.

I love your blog. I was looking for information to help me write on my blog, and I came across your blog.

It reminded me of the year 2000 when I left my abusive, psychopathic, stalking husband. I had to leave town to get away from his stalking and to feel safe. You are spot on. No one deserves to be abused and we did not cause it! No more excuses for unacceptable behavior.

I have now been married to the love of my life for ten years. I refused to let my ex hold me down, or disillusion me about men. Not all men are bad or abusive, and we did not cause it, or deserve it. We did NOT choose to be abused! 

Avalanche of the soul

Does your abusive partner start sentences with ‘If you loved me, you’d…’? When she apologises, is she expert in shifting the blame onto something or someone else (usually you)? Then there’s something BIG that you need to know: It’s not your fault. Yes, really.

Is your abusive partner dodging responsibility?

If you are in an abusive relationship, you will have heard these phrases (or variations of them). I call these the ‘if, only and just’ statements, and they are crafted to shift the blame elsewhere:

  • I wouldn’t need to do this if you would listen to me / stop doing that / do things right
  • I only act this way because you drive me crazy
  • If you really loved me, you wouldn’t do something that you know upsets me so much
  • It’s just because I’m stressed out with work that I am short-tempered at home
  • If I had a better…

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MOVE AWAY FROM THE DRAMA

Amen, praise God that today, I know that I have a choice. When someone pushes my buttons and tries to piss me off, I have a choice, and  I can choose to not “react”, or I can “react” and lose my serenity. I value my serenity and peace of mind today. 

I choose to live in the “solution” instead of the “problem”. I choose to remove myself from the drama. I cannot change anyone else, but I don’t have to put up with their bad attitudes and actions. I remove myself…I pray…I leave…go to a meeting…visit a friend…or maybe take a vacation. 

People have a choice too, and if they choose to continue to live in the “chaos”, that is their choice. I cannot stop others from living in the drama, but I can choose to not participate or live in it with them.

Moma always told us that if we could not say something nice then we should not say anything at all. I think that is some very good advice. It is not that I don’t want to help others, but I have come to accept that I cannot do it for them. 

I cannot imagine that when a person finds out that they have a choice,  that they would choose to be miserable.