Our True Home

Field of Sunflowers

“Our true home is in the present moment.

To live in the present moment is a miracle.

The miracle is not to walk on water.

The miracle is to walk on the green earth in the present moment,

To appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now.

Peace is all around us-

In the world and in nature-

And within us-

In our bodies and in our spirits.

Once we learn to touch this peace,

We will be healed and transformed.

It is not a matter of faith,

It is a matter of practice. “

source: The Twelve Step Prayer Book, written and compiled by Bill P. and Lisa D, 2004, Hazelden, http://hazelden.org

 

Watch “Kelly Clarkson – Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You)” on YouTube — Totally Inspired Mind…

I love this song. When I was going through some very challenging times a few years ago, this song made me want to dance in the mall, where I heard it the first time. I hope it inspires at least a few of you out there the same way. Paulette L Motzko April 15th, 2016 […]

via Watch “Kelly Clarkson – Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You)” on YouTube — Totally Inspired Mind…

What is a Dry Drunk? Signs and Ways to Overcome It!

If you have been around the rooms of a twelve step program then you probably have heard of the term dry drunk, but what does that exactly mean?  Basically, a dry drunk is an alcoholic that is sober but still acts like they did when they were drinking. They are usually angry and miserable most of the time and appear to be white knuckling through life just to not drink and be happy. This is why a program of recovery for alcoholics and addicts is suggested. 

Signs and Characteristics of a Dry Drunk

A dry drunk will start to show signs of anger, depression, discontentment, irritability and restlessness if they are not working on themselves. The hopelessness that they begin to feel starts to make them act out in unhealthy ways, which may in fact start to resemble behaviors they had when they were still drinking or using. Although the dry drunk isn’t drinking or using, they may no longer be motivated to stay clean and sober. This can happen because of a few different things: something happened where they lost all hope, they built a resentment, they believe that they don’t need to work any steps, they experienced a setback, etc. Whatever the reason for this syndrome, it can descend very rapidly and may lead to a relapse. The good news is that there are ways to overcome dry drunk syndrome.

How To Get Out Of The Dry Drunk Funk

Awareness of actions and a desire to change

Work a program of recovery (calling a sponsor, working the 12-steps, going to meetings, and helping others)

Build a stable sober support network

Maintain a relationship with a higher power

Learn new skills and hobbies

Growing Up

“We must no longer be children, tossed to and fro and blown about by every wind of doctrine, by people’s trickery, by their craftiness in deceitful scheming. But speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way into Him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and knitted together by every ligament with which it is equipped, as each part is working properly, promotes the body’s growth in building itself up in love.” Ephesians 4:14-16

As a child I dreamed of being Peter Pan, which was very confusing for me, since I was a girl. I wondered if I was odd or queer, because I wanted to be like Peter Pan, and be able to fly. I lived in my make believe world, because I was not happy in reality. I read romance novels and fairy tales. I longed for a world that had peace and love, and no one was hurt or hungry. Today, I realize that it was an Ideal but not Reality. I was a Dreamer. We can help some people, but we cannot save the world. Through my recovery, I have learned that I can help some people, the people that God puts in my path, but I am not God and I cannot save everyone. 

I totally disagree with this quote! Our dreams sometimes come true, if it is God’s will, and we do the footwork. But if it is not God’s will, then it will never happen. People cannot always get whatever they want just by sacrificing everything else for it. I do not like this quote! No matter how much a person  wishes for something or sacrifices for it, if it is not to be, then it will not happen.  

Children need to be taught that they will not always get what they want in life. And…that in life there will always be “good” and “evil”, because that is the world that we live in. Life is NOT fair! If it were there would NOT be so much evil in the world. They need to be taught to celebrate the “good” and be grateful for it, and accept the bad.  To grow up means that they must accept the responsibility for their own lives, and stop blaming others for their problems. 

If they fail to “grow up”, then they will be stuck in the Victim mode, they will be volunteering for others to run their lives, and they will be at the mercy of others’s choices.  It reduces their choices in life.

I choose to make my own choices, and to not follow the crowd. I choose to become a Victor instead of a Victim!