My Self Worth is NOT tied up in other people, or what they think of me. I am “God centered”, whereas I used to be “other centered”.
I had no Self Worth. I used to be “other centered”, and I lived my life to try and please everyone else. It never worked, invariably they would piss me off, or I would piss them off. People cannot be my “higher power”. People will always fail you, because they are human just like you are.
In my recovery, I had to learn to put God #1 and be “God centered”. I put God first, #2 myself, and #3 others. It may sound strange to some, but as long as I was living for everyone else-I was not happy. I had to learn to take care of me and be good to me, before I could help others.
I have been called “cold hearted” and “selfish”, when I stood up for my needs and stopped allowing others to hurt me or drag me down. I had to learn to set boundaries and not enable others. I was taught that I should not do something for someone else that they could do for themselves. Hence, not enable them to stay sick and selfish.
I have learned to steer clear of “toxic” people who are negative and angry, and would drag me down to their level.
I was told by my mentor, that I would be known by the company I keep. If I hang with angry, or hateful people, or women who were living immoral life’s, then that was who I would be judged to be. Right or wrong–it is reality.
When I put God #1 and worked on myself #2, then I had good things to teach to others. I learned to have self worth. I focus on the Solution instead of the Problem.
Day by day, my Self Worth has increased and I am healthier, the more serene and capable of helping others, I have become. It all boils down to the fact that God loves me, and therefore I am Worthy of good things.