My husband, “the light of my life.”
He is 58 and I am 60. God really does know what He is doing. We are able to be at home together with my “forced retirement”.
At first, I felt guilty, because I had always worked since I was 12. I was brought up to believe, that if I wanted something that I had to work for it.
Now, God wants me to care for my husband, obviously because that is where I am, for now, and I love it. Not the part about him being sick but the part about having him to share my life. In my program for living, and the twelve steps, I have learned to “accept life on life’s terms”, and so I am content with whatever God has given me.
I am so grateful for what God has given me, and for what He has taken away too–the chaos, insanity, and the loneliness. In its place God has given me serenity, peace, strength, and solace.
I thank God everyday for my 27 years in recovery, because without it I would not be doing as well on this “acceptance” thing. I accept the fact that I am NOT God, and that my husband is in God’s hands. I am grateful for every minute that He gives me with him until God calls him home.
The old me would be living in “self pity” and crying and whining around about how God made me wait so long for my hubby, and the fact that he is sick. I only saw the “bad” in my life.
Someone coined it, a “New Pair of Glasses”, they wrote a book about it. I have not thought about that book in a long while. I will have to get it out and look at it again.
I am looking through a new pair of glasses, and I am seeing what is “right” with my life instead of always looking for what is “wrong” in my life. It makes for a lot more peace and serenity.
Excellent book for anyone, even if you are not in Recovery.